Tavern Tales
by Lawrence Wolfwood
Summary: "Have all the potions and items you need? If so, proceed to the departure gate to hop onto your designated boats and off you go to your specified hunting grounds. Have fun and be safe. Oh! And don't forget those whetstones" with a final smile and a cheerful wave the blond-haired Hilda watched as the fresh group of intrepid hunters walked off through the bustling marketplace...
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1. Introductions, hammers at work and talk of food.

"Have all the potions and items you need? If so, proceed to the departure gate to hop onto your designated boats and off you go to your specified hunting grounds. Have fun and be safe. Oh! And don't forget those whetstones" with a final smile and a cheerful wave the blond-haired Hilda watched as the fresh group of intrepid hunters walked off through the bustling marketplace, sporting their hide-and-bone armour and wyvern slaying weapon of choice strapped to their backs.

She sighed as she leaned backwards to stretch her back that had started to voice quite uncomfortable complaints about the long day spent behind the Guild's quest counter.

"You know…" she started, turning to the other guild "sweetheart" beside her, a dark-skinned beauty by the name of Miko, "I'm happy and all that we've gotten so many new recruits to heave 'n ho, but I wish they wouldn't all get the bright idea to go on a non-stop questing spree all at the same flipping time! I mean I've hardly been able to go on a bathroom break without some eager busy bee rattling the old summoning bell of doom!"

"Well, if you didn't fuss over them like a concerned mother hen you just might get some time to do something else besides sitting there and letting the queue build until it reaches the armoury" Miko replied with a faint smile.

"I can't really help it can I?" Hilda muttered, lifting her hands in the air in a surrendering manner, "I mean half of them are so new at the job that they wouldn't know a pickaxe from a greatsword, let alone embark on a journey to successfully slap around some poor flamboyant piece of wildlife into submission!"

"Oh?" Miko said raising an eyebrow, "Is this perhaps your past experience as a trainee hunter talking?"

Hilda's face blushed bright red at the remark.

"How was I supposed to know that eating exciteshrooms after my rations ran out was a bad idea" she grumbled staring at the desk.

"And if memory serves" Miko continued, now with a wide grin on her face, "You returned from said gathering quest in such a state that you mistook the guildmaster for a monster and tried to make crafting materials out of his hide, all the while shouting obscenities that would have made even a hardened sailor cover their ears"

"You really didn't have to memorize all that!" Hilda squeaked turning an even deeper crimson.

"Indeed, nya!" a voice remarked from behind the two girls.

A rather stocky felyne with a large scar over his left eye and wearing a well-worn workers robe emerged from under the curtains covering the back portion of the establishment, "Tis' indeed an experience one would rather shake from ones fur!"

"But guildmaster!" Hilda cried out, flustered, "You know I didn't really mean any of it!"

"Indeed!" the feline guildmaster laughed placing a reassuring paw on Hilda's arm, "And tis' why your hard work of making sure the youngsters know the ropes, or at least a small purrcent of them, is extremely appreciated, nya!"

"And serving as a shining example of the dangers of a voracious and unregulated appetite is indeed helpful" Miko giggled behind her hand.

"That's it!" Hilda snapped regaining her composure, "Next time I get hold of some sleep herbs they are SO ending up on your plate!" she declared pointing at Miko threateningly.

"Now, now" The guildmaster chuckled, "No need to get your tails in a knot younglings"

"And speaking appetite…" He continued, eyeing the crowd bustling around in the shadows cast by the town's archway gates, "It seems all of today's eager hunters have successfully been sent off and won't be returning for a good while, so I do think it's high time you girlies went off yourselves and grabbed a bite…or two" he finished eyeing Hilda with an amused look.

"Will do boss!" Hilda said jumping up completely missing the guildmaster's playful jab, "Come on Miko! If we're quick we might be able to give your fanclub the slip at the Old Faithful" she beckoned her friend being unable to resist the chance to get back at her for the earlier comments, even if only a little bit.

"You're reading way too much into it" Miko sighed getting up too.

"Suuure, and the fact that you regularly get them swarming around you is purely because you're just so good at your job. Am I right?" Hilda taunted already dashing off into the crowd.

The guildmaster waved after the departing duo, purring ever so slightly as the first signs of evening activity started to appear among the Aptonoth and people wandering about the mosaic paved streets.

In a completely different direction, several miles away from of the vicinity of the previously mentioned island city of Fellhorn, the air was split by a ferocious screech.

The sound, capable of incapacitating anyone hearing it at close range, sent a tall armoured figure somersaulting through the air and landing into the fertile soil with a solid thunk accompanied by a displeased grunt.

The source of the roar, a large, adult male Tigrex eyed its fallen adversary with a hungry malice. But still, trough battle hardened instinct, stayed still sizing up the challenger who had disturbed its slumber.

The creature was quite a sight behold. Reaching a length of almost 24 meters with the powerful limbs, spike tipped tail, boxlike head with strong jaws and spiky ears protruding towards its arched back along with the trademark striped yellow-blue hide covered in old scars telling volumes of this veteran predator's supremacy.

However, the hunter who had been sent flying though the open expanse among the surrounding hills wasn't too impressed, though wisely attentive and cautious of the beast's impressive girth.

Pushing himself up, using his hammer as a support, he faced the terrible predator with a wild grin while readying himself to take this bothersome neighbour down.

"Yeah yeah, you're big, you're scary and all that. So why don't'cha come down here and get a taste of just how scared old Revy here is ya big old son'ova lizard?!"

Not willing to put up with such meagre taunts the Tigrex roared again, though this time with less force in it, and charged towards the impudent human who would dare to challenge it.

Shovelling away with its winged forelegs sending earth, grass and pebbles flying about the beast advanced in a frenzied flurry snapping together its jaws, ready to taste fresh meat.

But just as its terrifying maw was about to close around the hunter he ducked and rolled with almost impossible speed landing a quick blow to the beast's hind legs while its torso soared over him sending an electric shockwave trough the creature's entire body along with the impact.

With a surprised howl the Tigrex landed onto the hillside tumbling in a haphazard manner. It immediately attempted to regain its lost bearings while also trying to turn around for another charge at its adversary. But to the beast's misfortune it was simply too slow and thus received another crushing blow to its head from Revy's merciless hunting tool, making its vision flicker red and white.

"Y're slipping old boy!" Revy declared spinning his hammer around again and bringing it in for yet another forceful jab to the side of the Tigrex's head.

Staggering from the impacts and the consequent electric shocks the beast attempted to desperately fumble backwards to gain even a little bit of space between itself and its assaulter and as a result fell into the pitfall trap laid out behind it with a surprised yelp.

This was immediately followed by two spheres flying through the air, which when they hit the ground in front of the trapped predator, released a cloud of tranquilizer. As the substance slowly made it ever drowsier the Tigrex tried to claw its way out of the hole it had fallen into until finally it fell asleep with a begruntled burp and started to snore loudly.

"HAH! Another bothersome beastie tagged-n-capped!" Revy bellowed triumphantly slamming his hammer into the dirt, "Good job there lassie!"

"Pops…" A tall red-headed young woman sighed as she emerged from behind the rock formation she had used as cover "when we planned that you'd distract 'ol'bitey' as you affectionately call it and lure it into the trap, I distinctly remember telling you not to wrestle it in the process"

"Come off it daughter-of-mine, I've been wrestling these beasties long before yer we're even in yous mother's womb!"

"Have fun trying to use that excuse with mom when we have to pay for yet another armour repair" the woman scoffed, rolling her eyes.

"Kassandra!" Her father cried out eyeing her with a raised eyebrow, "when did ya become such a sour bumblepumpkin?!"

"Well maybe this concentration of sour would prefer her father not getting his nth body covering scar" Kassandra remarked as she started to tie the net the Tigrex had been caught in tighter around its massive body.

"Ach, come of it, he didn't have a change of tasting me in a Jaggi's age" Revy laughed waving around his arms.

"Really…" Kassandra said giving him a scolding look, then proceeded to grab a rock from the upturned soil, threw it into the Tigrex's mouth and firmly kicked the beast behind its jawbone. With a loud snap the terrible jaws slammed shut crushing the rock and sending shrapnel several meters around them.

"Ach… well…" Revy started, then catching his daughters knowing look decided it would be better to yield THIS fight.

"She certainly has inherited hers mothers temperament", Revy thought to himself a little annoyed but at the same time proud. Still bemused he too started to get the side-lined Tigrex ready for the alerted Guild transport airship appearing from over the horizon, which would relocate it (again) to the less inhabited tundra regions.

"If only the mongrels at the port wouldn't give her grief over her weapon choice"

He muttered to himself as Kassandra hefted her hunting horn over her shoulder having finished her end of the work.

"The ol'hammer'n'horn is as good a hunting tool as any. _Support,_ bah! If those sword obsessed younglings at the hall saw what she can do with it they'd thank their lucky starts she doesn't use it on 'em!" he pondered lifting his own weapon, stroking its handle.

"POPS!" Kassandra's yell interrupted Revy from his thoughts, "You staying to gather blue mushrooms or what? We're leaving and mom's going to hang you over the spit if you don't hustle"

"Bite yer tongue lass" Revy laughed as he trotted up the hill to the airship.

The evening sun turned everything shades of red and orange as the ship lifted into the skies carrying the still snoring predator in tow.

Back at the port a piece of metal resting on the armoury's anvil was of the same hue of red as the sun setting outside. With repeated strokes of a hammer it started to take the form of a beautiful curved longsword blade. The wielder of said hammer, a stocky boy-like figure of middle height with the trademark long and pointy wyverian ears, seemed as if in a trance of sorts as he let the tools shape the glowing weapon into its intended form.

 _Glang glang glang_! Each stroke fell with a resounding rhythm mixing in with the smithy's other sounds of roaring fires and creaking bellows creating a sort of low hum of activity that could be heard on the streets outside.

 _Glang glang glan_ …. KABOOOOOOOOOM! The explosion was so sudden that the boy almost accidentally crushed his glove protected hand he'd used to keep the blade in place. The commotion was almost immediately followed by profound cursing as the head smith, a middle-aged (by wyverian standards anyway) woman by the name Raksha, burst from the back of the armoury dashing towards the weapons maintenance area on the boys left.

"SON OF A GARUGA…THE GOGDAMM…TOLD HIM **FIVE** TIMES…" the rest of her less than favourable dialogue fading off as she turned the corner.

Puzzled the boy, affectionately called the Little Man by the smithy staff, carefully placed his still smouldering, now almost finished, work on the workstation. Along with the other workers still present at this hour he then cautiously headed towards the source of the racket.

The culprit who had caused the explosion was none other than the port troublemaker. The self-proclaimed greatest hunter of the city, Stevens, who was now bearing the full force of Raksha's fury.

"WHAT IN THE NAME OF THE ELDERS DO I HAVE TO DO SO THAT A SIMPLE, DON'T GOGDAMM TOUCH, GETS TROUGH THAT THICK SCALP OF YOURS?!" Raksha bellowed snatching the now smouldering remnants of a gunlance prototype from Stevens's hands simultaneously punching him on the shoulder, hard.

"Master forge" Stevens replied rubbing his now sore arm smiling in a supposedly endearing manner "My curiosity simply got the better of me, there is no cause for anger as…"

"Oh don't you greenhorn even try to sweet talk me!" Raksha interrupted,

"NOBODY and I MEAN NOBODY messes with your smithy's merchandise without permission! Especially not dungheads who don't have the common sense to not go firing off one of the more volatile hunting tools with sharp metal lying around!"

"Oh for heavens sake…" Stevens groaned returning to his normal way of talking since his attempts at suave performance clearly didn't work with Raksha, "I had it completely under control you kno…"

"Zip it!" Raksha snapped throwing the bag of monster parts she had carried at Stevens. "Take your ill-gotten scraps and scram back to whatever crevice you crawled out of before I heed my urge to feed your second-rate behind to the Jaggis!"

Stevens blinked in surprise, then fully realizing the insult his face swelled red with fury. He was about to reach for the dual blades strapped to his back in retaliation. However, noticing the amount of well-muscled artisans witnessing the scene he quickly thought better of it and, reluctantly, lowered his hands.

"Didn't want any rusted piece of trash this swindlers nest made anyways" He said turning around and spitting on the ground before stomping off, leaving his effects behind.

After he was well out of sight, Little Man approached nervously rubbing his hands together. "You think I could use these?" He asked, cautiously picking up the discarded materials.

"Personally, I wouldn't have anything he's owned, however briefly" Raksha scoffed, "But since you could probably make a full set of armour from those with those hands of yours, go for it. I highly doubt he'll be back for them"

She inspected the charred remnants of the now blackened gunlance and then sighed heavily, "Gogdamm that heap of Gongalala dung, this was going to be a real beauty" She grumbled heading back to the forge. "Shasha is going to have my head for this. Bet she'll be real happy to hear her hard earned parts got wasted"

The smithy's normal sounds of forging soon resumed in the darkening evening as the workers resumed their work and the curious onlookers who had been alarmed by the commotion also returned to their business. Soon it was like the scene had not taken place at all, a fatally false sense of calmness as later events would prove…

"Mmmmmmm, so tasty!" Hilda declared her mouth full of the bounty of food before her, "This is why Fellhorn is the BEST, no other place has food as good as THIS!"

"Said the Bulldrome by the mushroom patch" Miko laughed from the opposite end of the table (the FAR opposite end) while eating her own portion in MUCH more reserved manner.

"*Gulp* you're just jealous 'cos *noms* I keep my figure despite eating as much as I want" Hilda beamed unfazed. "Bet you can't say the same, o rose of the port."

"Lay off it!" Miko scoffed, "I've never claimed myself as such"

"Half the single male hunters disagree, you know" Hilda snickered.

"Miko still plagued by the love-struck youngsters?", a voice behind them asked.

"Yup!" Hilda replied turning to the tall woman behind her, "it's gotten so bad she almost has to use a crowbar to remove their elbows from the quest counter because they're more interested in trying to chat her up rather than leaving to hunt."

"HILDA!" Miko cried out exasperated, "Leonora! Don't encourage her!"

"Heh, sorry love, couldn't resist" Leonora, the owner of the Fanged wyvern smiled as she navigated her way through the maze of tables with a tray full of drinks in hand, "But can ya blame me? After all it's just mostly scruff workers and alpha male hunter-types who eat here, so I might as well make most of it when you girlies visit!"

"There's gal hunters too you know!" someone shouted from a nearby table.

"When you're able to bench press wyverns you hardly qualify as a lady anymore!" Leonora shouted back with a wide grin.

"Hah!" The armour-clad woman who had spoken snorted, "THIS coming from ex miss I'll crack-your-skull-open-bare-handed hunter of the year!?" her and Leonora then burst out laughing.

"Not that I'm not clad and all that you chose to host this place instead of hunting till retirement" Hilda pondered, "But why DID you quit Leo?"

"No hunting job was profitable enough to keep up with the appetite and armour wrecking rate of that silly husband of mine" Leonora replied fondly, "Besides I've found that I prefer conversing with people to constantly telling a Khezu to shut its trap"

"Revy must be quite a handful" Miko nodded, "I must say I'm surprised you two ended up together, and with a child to boot"

"I love 'im, quick and simple!" Leonora beamed while placing yet another plate in front of Hilda, "Besides every hunter has their quirks, as Hilda here can attest."

"I give up" Hilda sighed raising her food filled hands, "I might just as well accept you two are impossible and resign to your teasing"

"There there" Miko laughed.

The evening continued with the girls poking fun at each other, and as more and more people gathered into the tavern to enjoy some relaxation after a hard day's work, the hall was soon full of people laughing, sharing stories, singing and playing games.

As Revy burst inside with Kassandra in tow the customers voiced a protest as he promptly proceeded to blow through them to grab Leonora into a hearty embrace, which of course didn't deter him in the least.

Later they were joined by Raksha, Little Man and the rest of the smithy staff who happily decided to participate in the merrymaking.

And as the moon rose higher into the skies the port slowly quieted as everybody headed to the hall to eat, drink and laugh all their worries away.

Little did anyone know they would be part of the greatest upheaval ever to take place at the port of Fellhorn in the following days.

Glossary:

For those unfamiliar with the names pertaining to the Monster Hunter universe here are quick explanations for the ones used in this chapter.

For more detailed info you can google the Monster Hunter wiki

Excitesrhooms: a consumable item that has a variety of positive and negative effects

Elder dragons: basically the "final bosses" of the Monster Hunter games

The Guild: the "government" of the MH universe, oversees the hunters and their activities as well as protects the common folk from the ever-present monster population

Felyne: anthropomorphic cats that serve as companions and small mobs in the MH games, comes in two variety's; nice and docile and thieving little shits

Tigrex: cross a T-rex with a dragon and you get a Tigrex, notorious for its spastic and aggressive nature and a shining example of bs difficulty in the Monster Hunter Freedom Unite entry of the series

Bumblepumpkin: a vegetable in the MH universe

Jaggi: a carnivorous bird wyvern, considered a minor pest.

Hunting Horn: a musical instrument capable of invigorating those who've heard its music AND giving any monster a considerable headache, one of the 14 weapon types

Wyverian: the "elves" of the MH universe, master craftsmen

Gunlance: A short range mortar fitted onto a lance (one of the 14 weapons).

Yian Garuga: a purple chicken/dragon sent from the deepest pits to torment us gamers

Gogdamm: a wordplay on God and shortened Gogmazios, a final boss of sorts in MH4U.

Even the translators couldn't resist seeing as one of the quests in-game is named "An act of Gog"

Gongalala: a pink ape monster with a penchant for throwing poop. Yeah, they went there

Bulldrome:a giant boar…that's pretty much it. Has a fondness for mushrooms.

Khezu: an ambush predator type monster present in the games that for some reason screams an awful lot.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2. Arrival, conflict, and an encounter of the less pleasant kind.

"LAND HO!" The ship's lookout roared from his perch at the top of the mast.

The transport ship that had started its journey from almost the other end of the continent was now finally nearing its long-awaited destination. And for some on board this moment could not have come soon enough.

"Terra firma… solid… non-swaying… footing… here I come… urrrrrgghhh!" the burly, dark haired man hanging over the railing groaned before retching yet again.

"What, ya can't mean ye're already leaving us master hunter?" a sailor laughed as he passed the man, "How are we going to survive without yer green face bringing colour to this dreary old boat?"

"If we were on solid ground I'd kick your ass… uuughhh…!" the hunter growled, "The sooner I get off this torturous hell-hole the better… "

"Yeh, it's an acquired taste… much like yer used lunch!" another sailor quipped before scaling the ropes connecting the mast to the deck, laughing as she went.

"Alright you cheeky good-for-nothings, less tormenting the poor man and more trimming the sails!" the towering first mate of the ship barked at the crew, "We're already late as is and had this fine gent not shown that pesky Lagiacrus what for you'd have been at repairs for three more weeks!"

"Not long now master hunter" the first mate continued turning towards the seasick man, "Just try n keep what little you have left inside for a moment longer before we conclude yer ship watching duties"

"I'll try my best… no promises though…" the hunter grimaced, "By the elders why do boats have to sway so much?! Urgh!"

"Ye're an odd one alright" the first mate chuckled moving towards the helm, "Can't handle a little at seas seesaw even after three months but tackled a big ol'seabeastie in its element like ye're half fish!"

The hunter saw it better not to comment, in part due to the ship hitting a large wave and tilting strongly to starboard as it did so.

Not long after the ship's bow gently bumped into the port pier and with well-honed accuracy the crew started to unload all the goods stowed away in the ship's hold.

Meanwhile the hired hunter was affectionally getting re-acquainted with solid ground.

"Oh, hard stone, how I've missed you!" the hunter sighed while embracing the pier stone gate.

"A tad overdramatic presentation don't you think?" the toned captain of the ship remarked while counting coins from a purse in her hand.

"Not another word!" the hunter smiled tiredly, "Just give me the pay so I can go drink the last three months away at the local tavern."

"It was hardly THAT bad" the first mate chuckled, "You made good friends with the crew, a high feat for a landlubber such as yourself, and did a good job keeping the monsters off your merchandise. Rather well for someone with such poor sealegs."

"Here you go, 6000 zenny as agreed and a little extra for the job well done" the captain continued while placing the purse into the hunter's hands, "Now get yourself sorted out before you collapse for good!"

"Oi greenie!" One of the nearby sailors shouted, "Don't think you've seen the last of us, drinks are on me later tonight! Hafta make sure ya don't go spreading any weird rumours!"

"I hope you drown before that!" the hunter quipped back while making an obscene hand gesture.

"All right, off with you" the captain remarked while placing a small jab on the hunter's shoulder, "Linger here any longer and I'll strong-arm you back on the ship"

That was all the encouragement the hunter needed. With a quick and firm final handshake with both the captain and the first mate he headed through the pier entryway towards the busy centre of the city.

Miko was not pleased. Due to a surprise errand from the Wycademy Hilda had been unable to help her with managing the quest counter as usual.

This wouldn't have been such a bad thing in and of itself were it not for the fact that Hilda was often instrumental in getting the more forward male hunters actually hunting rather than making eyes at Miko.

After about the 5th guy who would not shut up about his hunting escapades (while taking a quest to hunt small fry) she'd started to hope she could set them on fire with a stern look alone.

"I swear, if I hear the words 'hey beautiful' one more Gogdamn time I'm going to scream… " Miko muttered to herself under her breath as she waved away yet another hunting party.

"Greetings gorgeous!" a voice spoke out from somewhere to her left.

Showing immense willpower Miko managed to subdue her urge to throw something at the speaker and instead put on her business smile as she turned towards the hunter who had arrived at the pier not to too much earlier.

"Good day. How may I help you?" she replied, managing to keep her voice a steady polite tone.

"Name's Argos. Just arrived to these parts and needed to get my hunter license approved for local use" the hunter smiled brightly while presenting his carving knife and Guild talisman for inspection.

"But of course," Miko nodded and reached out to receive the presented items.

As she did so she could not help but to notice the intense salty aroma mixed in with something rancid wafting from the hunter's somewhat weary personage.

Having examined the hunting knife's markings as well as the impeded Guild emblem on the talisman Miko made a few quick markings on the hunter registry in front of her and returned the offered items.

As she did so she could not resist the urge to comment on the hunter's state of appearance.

"Before you enter any public space I would suggest you head towards the Guild housing near the south pier and get yourself and your effects cleaned. That armour reeks something fierce!"

"Aaaaw, but this fine musk is pretty much a part of me now" Argos replied as if offended, "I spent an entire three months cultivating it at sea, fighting sea monsters night and day without barely a moments rest! It'd be a waste to get rid of it now!"

Normally Miko would've been able to see that the man was clearly joking, but something about his countenance (and her encounters with the prior boastful rookies) caused her already strained temper to flare over.

"Just take your stinking hide, go wash it somewhere far from here and stop wasting my time with your bloated exploits!" She snapped while slamming the registry shut with considerable force, "I've had enough of your kind for one day!"

Taken aback with the sudden outburst Argos raised his hands in a diplomatic manner.

"Ma'am, I did not intend to be a nuisance. My comments were merely done in jest… "

"Zip it! Not another word out of you!" Miko interrupted him, "The sooner I see your rancid, second-rate gear out of my sight the better! So shoo off back to the fish pile you slept in!"

Now while most hunters are indifferent to personal insults aimed at them any disrespect directed either at their weapons or armour will without fail set them off.

In this regard, Argos, who had planned to peacefully back away from this spirited Guild gal, was no different and hearing Miko's remarks kicked his normally semi-tempered nature on the backseat with his more boisterous side taking charge.

"Oh, don't you give me any of your sass missy!" he roared at Miko, "I've been risking life and limb and I DO NOT need some pampered office lady giving me grief over some unavoidable facts of life that follow that!"

"Neither do I need to tolerate NOR facilitate the ego stroking you testosterone fuelled punks are so in need of!" Miko snapped back.

After that the argument went on for a good 15 minutes, eventually degrading to the point where both sides were just flinging insults at each other, much to the puzzlement and amusement of the passers-by.

"Upstart port skank!"

"Overdue Jho-chow!"

"Aaaaand here is where the referee says STOP!" someone declared to their side.

Simultaneously both Miko and Argos were bonked on the head by two (rather heavy) tomes bringing their argument to a quick halt.

"I hafta say I never thought I'd see you go this far Miko" Hilda noted while tucking the tomes back under her arm, eyeing both contestants rather sternly, "And sir, I'd appreciate if you didn't refer to my friend with such uncalled-for monikers"

"Now, I want to hear how all this started without any further name-calling and then we'll sort this whole mess out like actual adults!"

Rubbing their heads rather sheepishly Miko and Argos went over the whole thing, with both of them becoming rather embarrassed as they heard the other side of the story.

"Good grief, and people say I'm the immature one" Hilda sighed while shaking her head, "Let's just have both of you apologise and we can consider this whole debacle over and done with, 'kay?"

"Right. Sorry ma'am, I flew off the handle a tad back there" Argos said, bowing slightly at Miko, "If ya could let the insults slide it'd be wildly appreciated. Didn't really mean any of it, just got caught in the heat of the moment"

"Likewise," Miko replied while returning the gesture.

"Whew! Now that's dealt with I'd say Miko clearly needs a break. And while we're at it lets show Argos around the place and grab some chow to cool things off" Hilda said while placing her well used tomes behind the quest counter.

"But shouldn't I still oversee the counter?" Miko asked while attempting to regain her composure by organising the pens and such on the table in front of her.

"And badmouth another poor sap who isn't as well versed in backtalking as Argos here?" Hilda said, raising an eyebrow, "The boss already gave the all clear when I left the archives, we're going"

"I appreciate the gesture for sure, but I think I'll manage on my own" Argos shrugged, a little uneasy about the backhanded compliment, "Besides wouldn't it be tad awkward for me to tag along after… all that?"

"Deal with it!" Hilda declared, while pointing at Argos with the sovereignty of a ruler, "I make it a point to get to know all the new hunter faces anyways. Not to mention I want to make sure you two really do make up. Food and drink helps with that AND I'm famished!"

"Well… if you say so" Argos nodded slowly, then burst out laughing to the point he had to brace himself against his knees, "This has got to be the most eventful introduction I've gotten in my life! Fellhorn sure is a place like no other"

"Of course! We're the best!" Hilda said puffing out her chest with her hands on her hips.

Even Miko let out a small laugh at the sight despite trying to keep a straight face.

And so, after brief visit to the Guild housing where Argos applied a much-needed change of clothes the three headed towards the town centre. During this journey, Hilda quickly befriended Argos to the point that upon arriving to the tavern the two seemed like they'd know each other for years.

Elsewhere the calm of the evening woods was shaken with intense rumbling and the sound of trees creaking and breaking en masse.

This was followed by a figure dashing out from among the undergrowth at top speed while cursing to themselves as they went.

"Gogdamnit… son of the deep elders… aaaaargghhh! Why'd it have to be you!?"

This was almost immediately followed by a bipedal, hulking green figure tearing through the woods with its fang covered jaws grasping at the hunter running ahead of it.

The Deviljho in question payed no heed to the thick growth impending its movement and barrelled through trees and other blockage with impunity without hardly slowing down despite the hunter's best efforts to outmanoeuvre the brute wyvern using the environment.

"I swear… huff… if they ever fail to correctly scout the area… hah… again, I'll toss those observation team fools into the sea…!" the hunter gasped vaulting a large log while simultaneously dodging a bite from the beast following her by only a hairs width, which sprayed acidic saliva on her helm that hissed on contact.

Shasha, the hunter now neck deep in trouble, had embarked on a simple nest raid with the intention of scoring quick cash. The quest had proceeded smoothly up until the point she had almost ran into the jowls of the Deviljho now chasing her as she'd been avoiding the egg's parent.

The pursuing Rathian had quickly dispersed when the green tyrant had been alerted by the commotion, wisely thinking it better to ensure the safety of the rest of the brood rather than contest a lone egg with a creature twice her size.

Naturally the Deviljho had in turn seen it more profitable to chase the earthbound prey rather than follow the airborne wyvern.

"This is so… hah… uncalled for!" Shasha shouted as she spotted yet another fallen tree in her way.

With a grunt, she tossed the egg she still carried into the air while running and dove into a slide through the gap between the giant trunk and the forest floor, just before the Deviljho's two, well-muscled legs landed behind her as it attempted to bounce upon her.

Using her momentum Shasha sprang back on her feet on the other side of the gargantuan log and barely managed to catch the egg she'd thrown without breaking it.

"Hah! Let's see you… gasp… clear that!" she taunted the beast, but did not stay to find out if it would indeed climb over.

Making a break for it yet again Shasha cleared the forest edge only to come face to face with a ravine splitting the border between the woodlands and the plains stretching before her.

"Oh, COME ON!" She cried out exasperated, "Is it some kind of universal 'screw over Shasha day'?!"

As if in response an aggravated roar from somewhere behind her signalled that careful planning time was a luxury NOT available at the present moment.

"Oh, they better pay me triple for this!" Shasha groaned.

Quickly unfastening the large shield on her arm Shasha placed it on the top of the hill pointing her makeshift sledge towards an upwards protruding rock at the edge to ravine down below.

"Lord of Chance of save me…" She whispered before kicking off the shield into a rapidly accelerating slide while grasping onto the egg for dear life.

As the shield hit the ramp-like stone and soared into the air Shasha felt like the time came to a halt. She was rudely brought back to reality by the impact of barely landing on the other side of the chasm and was sent tumbling among the grass.

For a moment, she could not move as she lay sprawled among the open expanse, trying to catch her breath and stop her heart from bursting through her chest.

"Okay… hah.. status report" She gasped after finally being able to speak again, "Two legs? Check. Two arms? Slightly bruised, but check."

She paused to look around herself, "Gear? Intact and accounted for, however amazing that is…"

Pushing herself up Shasha groaned as the aches set in.

"One head and back. Sore for weeks. One behind. Well tenderized, though thankfully uneaten…" She gasped as her vision swayed slightly, "That just leaves…"

Bracing herself for the worst Shasha turned towards the egg only to find it nestled comfortably in a patch of herb growths, shell still pristine and unbroken save for a few blotches of dirt on it.

"SCORE!" Shasha voiced at the top of her lungs, "A non-omelette to take home and secure the pay!"

"GROAAAAAAAAAAAARRR!"

Startled Shasha spun around (immediately regretting the fast movement) only to find the Deviljho on the other side of the ravine, restlessly pacing back and forth in frustration.

"Hah! Serves you right you overgrown pickle!" Shasha jeered at the creature, "Not light snack for your sorry ass today, try again in a thousand years!"

"RAAAAAAAAAWWRRGGH!"

Flipping off the gargantuan predator one last time Shasha gathered together her scattered effects and the hard-won egg. After taking a quick sip of potion to ease the pains she then hoisted her gunlance on her back and with the egg in tow started the treck towards the extraction point. All the while brainstorming the most effective way to tell off the lookout who had assured her that there'd be "absolutely nothing out of the ordinary to look out for".

Glossary:

For those unfamiliar with the names pertaining to the Monster Hunter universe here are quick explanations for the ones used in this chapter.

For more detailed info you can google the Monster Hunter wiki.

\- Lagiacrus: A leviathan hailed as the "Lord of the seas", that often attacks fishing boats and even large ships. Appearance wise a mix of a crocodile and an sea-serpent.

\- Wycademy: The Hunter's Guild research division.

\- Deviljho: A nomadic Brute wyvern known for its tendency to eat through entire ecosystems to satiate its constant hunger. Capable of utilizing the mysterious dragon element.

\- Gunlance: A short range explosive shotgun strapped to an oversized bayonet.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3. Gambling, hearsay, and paperwork.**

"Fangs!"

"Claws!"

With a quick flourish the man at the head of the table dropped two dices from the cup he was holding onto the table.

"Looks like it's a wash for you Argos, should've hanged onto that plate" he commented upon inspecting the reading of the dice as well as the wooden play pieces placed onto the middle of the table.

"Damn it!" the latter groaned as his opponent swept a couple the chips in front of him into his own pile, "At this rate I'll be leaving in my underwear"

"Be clad it's not Shasha or heaven forbid Little Man you're playing against" the bare-chested, lean fisherman sitting opposite Argos smirked, "Were it either of those two you'd either be losing from start to finish or have a certain victory pulled from under you at the last second!"

"Wait, the little tyke can actually play?!" Argos asked, puzzled, "Every time he's been asked it's always 'I'd rather not' or 'maybe some other time', I figured he was just dodging the subject on account of not being in the know"

"Hah, that 'little tyke' is older than any of us here and him not playing with new people is an act of mercy if anything" The bearded giant manning the dice cup chuckled, "In the 20 years I've played I've yet to see him lose once!"

"Yikes, wouldn't know it by the look of him" Argos sighed, "Thanks for the forewarning"

"Don't think I can't send you to bankruptcy as well, friend" the fisherman leered as he set up the next round, "By the time I'm done with you you'll be begging for mercy!"

"I know I've said this before Siam, but you truly are as coldblooded as your hauls" Argos frowned as he picked out five new game pieces for himself.

"I'd be a fool not take advantage of you hunters" Siam hummed, "I may not be able to best monsters like you lot but don't think for a second that I won't benefit from the spoils by betting you under the table!"

"Ach, don't mind him. He's just in a little bit of a mean mood since Kassandra finally beat him at hand wrestling" the bearded giant remarked, fiddling the dice in his hands.

"Oh, don't you start Germa. The girl's got a mean grip since birth and me losing to her has nothing to do with the fact that I'm planning on wiping this slant-eyed gentleman clean" Siam snapped.

Germa was content with just a light chuckle as he placed the dice into the cup and started shaking again.

"Speaking of whom" Argos continued as the dice hit the table, "What's the story with the read-headed trio? They look like the same person, just a few years apart in each case."

"Leonora, Kassandra and Shasha?" Siam asked, while swiping yet another set of chips into his own pile, "The first two is easy, Leonora is Kassandra's mother so no surprise there that they look alike"

"As for Shasha, well she's a bit of an oddball" Germa continued, "From what I gather she's from somewhere north where those kinds of looks are common, though we've never gotten anything concrete"

"You'd be hard pressed to find anything of that sort when it comes to her background" Siam snorted as Argos managed to nab one of his better play pieces for himself, "The lass shuts tighter than the flood gates when it comes to anything of her before coming here"

"Which by the way, is another avenue of bets around these parts" he continued as the dice entered the cup again, "The current haul is somewhere around 90000 zenny for anyone who manages to get her hometown correct, I believe"

"Elders burn me, 90000 zenny!?" Argos gasped, "All for her hometown?"

"Fangs!"

"Claws!"

"Hmmm, seems like Argos took this round" Germa remarked while stroking his beard.

"Squalls arisen! The cheeky slant-eye got me!" Siam hissed while snapping his fingers.

"Who's going to swipe clean whom?" Argos winked as he cleaned out his spoils, "Back to Shasha, how in the world did she get such a bet on her?"

A flash of lightning illuminated the somewhat dim gathering room on the upper floor of the Guild housing and the following thunderclap drowned out the discussion momentarily before the faint howling of wind and rain outside could be heard again.

"Who can say?" Germa shrugged as he juggled the dice yet again, "I mean a Gold Crown hunter is bound to generate wide interest wherever they go, much more so if they're as tight lipped as she is"

"If I had to guess though I'd say it's from her early days when the newbies thought they could romance her and as such tried to dig up as much dirt as they could" Siam jabbed in as he set up his next play, "A fool's errand if ya ask me. That titaness is about as open to advances as a puffed up Gobul"

"Gobul?" Argos shook his head, indicating he had no idea what that was.

"Oh right, eastern softie" Siam nodded scratching his chin, "Think an overgrown, land dwelling pufferfish that has decided to dress up in 4 foot spikes and loves to roll on you with said spikes. You'll run into one eventually if you stick around these parts long enough"

"I'll pass" Argos gestured as he set down yet another winning straight.

"Barnacles and brig muck!" Siam exclaimed, "Germa, you haven't tampered with the dice have ya?"

"Straight and true" Germa chuckled, "Careful now Siam, you'll end up working for the man to pay your losses if this keeps up"

"In yer wildest dreams landlubber" Siam sneered, flipping Argos off, "But yeah, if ye're looking for wild stories of origin Shasha ain't the only one with a dubious streak to her"

"Take the furry Guildmaster for example, that fat cat has supposedly been in charge of these parts since days of old" Siam snapped his fingers as the dice showed a tie between him and Argos, "Now that's mighty suspicious not only because no felyne should be that old, but also 'cos normally you'd have a wyverian running any Guild operations"

"Actually, I did wonder about that" Argos nodded as he passed on two of his play pieces onto the middle row, "Where I come from the cats are junior officials at best"

"Story goes that that no-good door rug strong-armed some poor old sod off his seat at claw point 'cos he wanted the top spot in charge of all the fishing rights so he could stuff himself without anybody crying foul" Siam scoffed as he had to suffer another tie.

"A story you more than happily propagate dear friend" Germa shook his head, amused, "Argos you'd do well to not pay heed to anything Siam here says of the Guildmaster. He once caught him eyeing his haul rather hungrily and has not been at ease around boss cat since"

Siam's obscenity that followed was drowned out by yet another clap of thunder rolling over the port.

"How long does weather like this usally go for?" Argos asked as he traded places with Germa, having given up on any further winnings and deciding to bow out before he really did lose all his worldly possessions.

"We'll know when it stops" Siam sneered, "You as scared of the weather as you are of playing the game to the bitter end?"

"Your words wound me!" Argos cried out theatrically, "But I guess I cannot deny my fear of clean water… which incidentally is good for washing off crusty bilge rats "

"Can I gut him?" Siam asked pointing at Argos in a threatening manner.

"I'd advise you not to" Germa replied while setting up his first game, "After all, he's one of the few people around here who can tolerate you for more than a few minutes at a time"

"Figures it had to be a slant-eyed eastern softie… " Siam muttered to himself.

"Dices are rolling! Place your bets!" Argos declared as he shook the cup with great vigour and let the dice loose onto the table top…

Another bright lightning bolt pierced the sky and the following thunder was loud enough to send the windows all over town rattling.

Behind one such set of windows various monsters caged within the large storage space did not take to this well and for a moment the air was pierced with various roars and screeches until the door of the hall creaked open and the light of small lantern shone through, upon which most of the noise died down.

"Of deary me, oh deary deary me!" The small pointy eared personage at the other end of the handle holding the lantern muttered as she dashed across the great hall towards a rope by the windows.

"I told them a hundred times! A hundred times I told them!" She continued as she lowered the blinds hanging above the large arched windows on the sides of the hall, "Don't forget the blinds I told them! Storm flash makes the darlings upset I told them! Yes, I told them a hundred times, I did!"

Having blocked out the sights of the storm the small figure scooted over to the cages

and one by one inspected the occupants within, talking to each of them in turn.

"Ah don't worry darling you can't fall out of the sky here" She cooed to a restless Rathalos as the wyvern sifted it wings making the cage it was held in clatter.

"Poor thing, upsets you this racket, it does!" She purred while petting the leg of Duramboros more than ten times her size.

The creature responded with a low disgruntled growl that came deep from its stomach along with low thuds from its mace like tail.

Each in turn the felyne lady talked to and calmed all the various creatures held in the relocation centre, from the impossibly long hissing Najarala to the stocky Great Jaggies cooped into a holding pen.

"Such negligence" the small cat hissed as she made sure each creature was accounted for one last time, "Mewian told them as storm was coming, she did! But what do they do? Sleep herbs! The savage stompers give them sleep herbs! The poor darlings can't eat if they're scared! So, sleep herbs do as much good as teaching a hunter to play fetch with boulders!"

With a final dissatisfied growl Mewian opened the water container located near the ceiling which then filled the drinking stations with all cages. Having now done all she could at the present moment she then headed towards the archives within the building adjacent to the relocation hall.

"Mewian will voice a complaint, oh yes she will!" The felyne muttered as she climbed the stairs to the archive door.

On the way, Mewian paused as she caught a glimpse of the main island as it momentarily became visible through the heavy rain, illuminated by yet another lightning bolt.

"Hubby won't be let to leave the poor darlings in incompetent paws again, no he won't!" she continued with re-invigorated determination once the following thunder died out, "Hubby will be made to know this kitty is not to be trifled with, oh yes he will!"

As she pried open the heavy double doors her aggravated mind started to even out as the smell of dry parchment, guills and ink sprung out to soothe her thoughts.

Still determined to carry out what she had set out to do however, Mewian dashed within the labyrinth that was the Guild archives to secure all the necessary tools she needed and not before long she had occupied herself at one of the smaller tables engrossed entirely in writing.

So engrossed in fact, that she did not hear the archive doors open again nor did she pick up the careful footsteps that followed, all despite having some of the sharpest ears on the islands.

Even when the lurking steps sounded right behind her Mewian failed to discern the fateful sounds and it was not until a heavy paw grasped her by her neck that she noticed anything.

"MEEEEOOOWWW!" She gasped in surprise, slapping at the appendage holding onto her as she did so.

"Sush kitten, it's just me!" the Guildmaster meowed in lynian, "You've been cooped up here all night without a moments rest and I came to make sure you'd at least eat"

"Hubby! You know better than to sneak up on mew like that!" Mewian sighed, relieved to find that it was only her tomcat who'd scared her.

"Kitten, you could let an entire storm of wyverns pass you by without so much as a twitch when you're reading or writing" the Guildmaster purred fondly, "What's more you'd hardly be pleased if I actually did make enough noise to disturb you"

Muttering something undiscernible Mewian put down her pen and allowed herself to be whisked off by the paw to the kitchen downstairs. There the Guildmaster led her to a small table and then quickly set out to serve her with the help of the other feline staff working at the hour.

With a serving of hot coddle fish stew inside her Mewian finally had gathered herself to the point where she could bring up the issue that'd been bugging her since earlier.

The Guildmaster listened patiently and finally opened his mouth after his spouse had finished her bit.

"I'm sorry kitten, we didn't think we'd have this many meaownsters at the hall before the storm hit and the new folks probably didn't know about the blinds, that said…" the Guildmaster to a few sips of the milk he'd placed in front of himself, "There's no need for you to write a complaint every time these things happen. You can just come straight to me and chew these ragged years off whenever you have something to say!"

He smiled as he said this while placing a reassuring paw on Mewian's.

"Mewian just likes letters… mew can't really say mew mind as well without paper" she responded quietly while looking down, "Hubby and others are so lucky to be able to say what mew like, when mew like… it's not as easy for mew"

The Guildmaster let out a laugh, rose and moved to the other side of the table before hoisting Mewian onto his burly paws.

"What a treasure you are!" He said while licking Mewians ears, "I'll get the meaownsters sorted out before you can shake your tail three times. Meanwhile, you kitten need some sleep before you collapse for good!"

"Mew is just fine!" Mewian protested, though with not much conviction.

"Kitten, you have been running your tail off since early morning, and spry though you may be enough is enough!" the Guildmaster purred as he turned out of the door towards their shared housing.

The felynes left in the kitchen shared a few knowing looks and laughs before returning to their duties after the Guildmaster and Mewian were out of sight.

The thunderstorm continued to rage on throughout the night and I wasn't until late into the following day that the seas were calm enough for the inhabitants of Fellhorn to resume their duties and livelihoods.

When they did so however, many more adventures and happenings were ready to welcome them as if the storm had merely been a minor intermission in this cosmic play of life.

Glossary:

For those unfamiliar with the names pertaining to the Monster Hunter universe here are quick explanations for the ones used in this chapter.

For more detailed info you can google the Monster Hunter wiki.

\- Gobul: A species of leviathan found in shallow waters. Think an angler puffer-fish frog.

\- Gold Crown hunter: While not a direct take from the games represents the highest ranking a hunter can receive. Naturally the title carries with it quite a lot of prestige.

\- Rathalos: A male wyvern with striking red coloration and a penchant for skilful flight.

\- Duramboros: A mountain sized beast with a huge club for a tail.

\- Najarala: A giant snake like creature whose back plates and tail can amplify sound for offensive purposes.

\- Great Jaggi: The alpha male of a Jaggi pack.


End file.
